This Morning in the Kitchen

• Me: Good morning.
• Brandon: Madelyne, did you see my wiener this morning?
• Me: Um, no. Should I have?
• Brandon: I was out there peeing for a really long time. I thought you might have.
• Me: Nope.
• Brandon: Oh, okay then.
• This actually makes Brandon sound like a perv but he was peeing off the deck, outside of his door, which just happens to be near-ish mine. And we made awkward eye contact through my window as I woke up and stretched.